Sunday, 22 March 2015

Limited week?

Last few weeks were like a rolllercoaster again for me. We celebrated Meg's "Birth"day (9 months after the accident) on Friday and Saturday. Saturday was with the whole family together, I thought one group of people for half an hour is less intense as every 10 minutes 2 new people, asking the same etc. So after her afternoon nap at 15:00 h. I stayed in the main hall from the McDonaldshouse and my parents and sisters plus their children came in. A self baked cake was brought in by my mother, others helped with glasses, plates etc.  Then Meg arrived in her wheelchair smiling from ear to ear.

 She loved seeing us all together, 8 adults and 11 children...  We blew the candles and she opened presents. Enjoying it to the fullest. She even asked me when is my friends birthdayparty? I said just wait til your next real birthday in September, then we wil do a freinds party too...

After the kids had eaten their cake they went outside. First day with a lot of sun and temperature of 16 degrees Celsius. Thank you all for whom send a nice card to her,. She got them on Monday and Tuesday and Wednesday too.

On Monday I cycled Janna to school. Houthem- Meerssen- Bunde and the same way back to be with Meg again. I cycled this route too on Sunday. A good initiativ for my condition I thought... but  my goodness cycling for an hour,,, I did feel my untrained/ used muscles . However I planned to keep doing so.... Until that Tuesday March 10th. when we left later as planned, as Janna needed to be convinced we had to cycle, no car around. It was raining and cold but we stepped on our bicycles and we arrived at school. where I wanted to check again what time it was... but no phone where i put it back... I lost it!!! So I immediately cycled the same way back even on the wrong side of the street. nothing to be seen.. When I came back, wet and cold, I first called my own number, hoping someone wil answer it... nothing.. I warned family and blocked my simcard. I called the police and they said it is now task of the townhall office. Posted a message on fb and it was shared many times, but without luck :( I didn't have more time as at 11 o'clock Meg was finally getting her first swimmingpool session!   I helped her with her swimmingsuit and she was so happy, she was finally able to enjoy being in a swimmingpool. It helped me forget the disasterous morning. She used her right arm and leg like it used to be, but left wasn't moving much. However when she had to do as if she was cycling she was able to move both legs. Then back to reality...The pictures and films about last few weeks were lost... such a pity and a worry too, as they are very personal, what if the finder adds them to internet etc? Bah I felt sick of it and restless as no one was able to contact me.... no phone.... I expected calls from the lawyer and docter. On thurday I descided to buy a new cheap phone and a new prepaid number, just to be available again. On Monday 17th I received my new simcard with old number, installed it and was back available with my own old number  a good thing :) . I lost all phone numbers I had, from family, freinds, but also the doctors, therapists etc..., .

But during that same week I also had to move out the appartment here in the mcdonaldshouse, going back into a room as they had  many bookings for vacation in the appartement. So Wednesday I packed some,Thursday en Friday moved all. Meanwhile Janna got sick again too. This week was a limited one I hope.

Tuesday March 17th, the Birthday of my mother, but also my school and me planned a say goodbye meeting for my colleques and me. It was not something I was looking forward too. As saying goodbye is not easy for me, and  I love teaching but was in doubt what is right to do. Some students I have are not the easiest ones and  in the last year before Meg's accident there were "signs" on my path. But in my case now all with Meg I couldn't see myself teaching again ,,, It was a bittersweet afternoon. Knowing it is the right thing to do, but on other hand so much uncertain things now for future. Having no job means, getting an income from gouvernment, but with the task to hunt for a new job at least 4 times a month. It also means I cannot buy a house in future as income is too uncertain for a bank to give mortage,  Many uncertain things, but I try to think and live only in the present, today.... Anyway the meeting was a good one, it was good we did so. Many colleques came and it was nice talking to them again.some became really good freinds during the 10 years I worked there. Again a turning point in  my life...
Meg is since this week able to make her own bread in the morning, She uses a special kind of plate with knots at 2 sides, so the slice of bread cannot be pushed off that plate. She also got a borrowed electrical wheelchair to see if she was able to use it well. And she did! ofcourse she needs some more practice and after two days using it for half an hour she complained about pains in her back = A sign she needs to start using her muscles there again. to keep sitting straight :)

The week was passed by in an eyeblink and when the therapist wish us a nice weekend! I think no weekend for me not a huge difference with a normal day other as I am allowed to go to Meg the whole day. On Saturdaymorning I organised music therapy for Meg, which she loves. So visit can only come after her afternoon rest, but even then she needs to stand on the standing table.. sigh , for me sometimes so hard to plan visit...  so please bare me when i don;t reply to your request for a visit to Meg immediately. ..  not only Meg needs her rest..... :-)

Well this post is now long enoug, I better keep it this way and besides that time to go back to Meg again.. Bye til next post!

Ps. Wifi connection is sometimes a disaster here... just so you know.


  1. I am always eager to read your posts, Kim..thank you for sharing your life with us..these ups and downs…sending much spring caring and hugs from here (Seattle). So glad you got good photos of the birth day celebration and family visits..xx

  2. Thank you Ginny. Sometimes i just think my post aren't good / well written, but i do hope it shows a little of my life right now. Funny thing is after posting a new blog I always check from where people are reading my blog, amazes me everytime, over and over again... :) gives me strength too.

  3. My dear Kim, glad to see the progress of Meg. Know how hard the days of the past 9 months and your decision to quit the jobs. With every minute your tender care to Meg, it is worth. So happy to see Meg's smiles. Love to read your blog and wish Meg and you all best. Thoughts with you always.

  4. Kim Thank you for sharing your deeply felt experiences, feelings with us. Your heart is open and that is a rare and special thing. Sending love and light to you and the whole family.

  5. wat fijn dat Meg is begonnen met zwemmen, moet heerlijk voor haar zijn! Geweldig om al die vooruitgangen te lezen! Wat gaat het goed en snel toch :-) En wat een tegenvaller van je telefoon, maar zoals ik al schreef, droomde ik van een oude onbekende man die jouw telefoon aan mij gaf. Wie weet, komt het goed! Heel veel knuffels lieve meid ♥ Es


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