Hurray Meg is turning 15 today!
It is her Birthday a day after the attack at the twintowers in New York. I stil remember how hard my belly got seeing these planes fly into the towers. Every channel showed it. I Thought these belly pains were from seeing this but day after they were contractions. at 17:59 h. Mechttildis alias Meg was born. Doubts about how the world would change when she would grow up... A world war III ? We didn't even feel like adding out a flag outside our house to show we got something to celebrate. We waited 2 days found it inappropiate to do so when so many people died in New York.
Back to today... 15 years later, The things happened to her in June 2014 was not in my imagination, Somehow I feel sad on this festive day. That normal healthy child is not there anymore and I really miss that a lot today. All the fighting to survive, therapies, adjustments, wheelchair, wheelchairbus, divorce, rented home, special school, diapers, her stil not at home due to not able to shower her..... she is not able to cycle, go to school by herself with a bunch of children going to the same school, talking is stilll not there , (but I keep faith in it, I hear her sometimes) it all makes me cry.
Which is good, needs to come out too. so even 15 years later no flag out today.
|Janna baked at grandma's place a cake for Meg|
We held her birthdayparty yesterday, family and some freinds came and it was fun, but today it all feels so double.
She is at school now, We blockstamped each classmates firts letter on handkerchiefs using the handkerchief as wrapping paper around a simple healthy apple. For the teacher I cut some flowers from my garden. I drove Janna first to school, so proud of that daughter too!. Then to Meg's room in the clinic, to get her cloths and chargers back in her room. the "nurses there were singing when we came in :) they written on the chalkboard a message to Meg :
Happy Birthday Sweet Meg. I love you and am very Happyand gratefull to stil have you <3 <3 <3